Writing game 4
Response to Hills like White Elephants
Genre: Poetry
The choices I must make
I sit before the beaded curtain here
Wondering what is going to be next
The decision I must make is so near
I want to do the things that is the best
The best could be what I want in my heart
The best could be what my love wants for us
To my heart his choice feels like a black dart
But I have to do what he wants, I must
We sit and drink waiting for the grey train
I want to be like we were in the past
I look out the window down the long lane
This grey train is the ending of the last
I have made up my mind and my love wins
This choice is going to make my heart bend
Wondering what is going to be next
The decision I must make is so near
I want to do the things that is the best
The best could be what I want in my heart
The best could be what my love wants for us
To my heart his choice feels like a black dart
But I have to do what he wants, I must
We sit and drink waiting for the grey train
I want to be like we were in the past
I look out the window down the long lane
This grey train is the ending of the last
I have made up my mind and my love wins
This choice is going to make my heart bend
Wow, you are a genius, it's excellent!!!!
ReplyDeleteYea, this is a good voicing of what the girl character in the story might be thinking. It may be me, but I think she has come beyond 'love' for him, as she says pretty strongly that things between them are ruined...
ReplyDeleteI like the 'black dart'!
I like your way of getting the meaning through in your poem. I really think that you convey her point of view and her thoughts. I also like that even though it is a poem it seems like you have out much more into it than just it having to be a poem. It seems as though you really picked the right genre... Good job
ReplyDelete